Negative thoughts tend to be critical in their tone and can leave you feeling inadequate. Sometimes self-critical thoughts can make us work a bit harder and achieve our goals. But sometimes our negative thoughts can cause us more harm than good.

What is self-criticism
Self-criticism is making harsh, negative evaluations of ourselves. Negative thoughts translate into feelings of inferiority, doubt, failure, and guilt. Dwell on them too long and it can help depression and anxiety turn up in your life. Self-reflection is useful to help achieve our goals but if the reflection becomes too critical then our thoughts become condemning not encouragement to us.

Where do self-critical thoughts come from
Self-critical thoughts can come from different parts of our lives such as work, home, childhood and the demands we place on ourselves. We internalise messages from other people and our environment. If we allow those thoughts to stay around too long, it can lead to poor wellbeing and low motivation.

How can self-compassion help
Self-compassion is being kind to ourselves when faced with challenges or suffering, (like what we do to others). One way to practice self-compassion is by noticing, and challenging, our negative critical thoughts. Being aware of our inner critic can help us break the habits or patterns of self-criticism, while allowing us to be honest about our fears. Think of it as a friend encouraging you to think about things in a clearer, more balanced way.

What are some of the ways to overcome self-critical thoughts
Acknowledge that your self-critical thoughts came about for a reason and may be an attempt to help you make changes or achieve a goal. Try not to criticise yourself for being self-critical.

Write two lists of your achievements and compliments you have received. Keep this list handy for when you’re feeling down and read it when you need to push back at your negative thoughts.

Don’t strive for perfection – embrace making mistakes. Try not to compare yourself to others and remember that no one is perfect.

How to reduce and shift self-critical thoughts
Thought challenging is a helpful tool to use to manage self-critical thoughts. It involves noticing when you’re having a negative, critical thought, not immediately believing it, and taking the time to question that thought. Is there another way of thinking about the situation? How can you think in a way that fosters kindness and self-compassion?

Some tips for challenging self-critical thoughts include asking yourself
How might I talk to a friend going through this same situation?
How realistic is this thought?
Is there a different perspective I can consider, rather than this automatic, negative perspective?
What is the evidence for, and against this thought?

Overcoming your self-critical thoughts can be difficult at first but with time and practice you can start to develop a more balanced inner voice, and eventually this will come naturally to you.