Keeping a marriage happy can be difficult if a couple approaches it from an unrealistic position. If you think you will never have a cross word or get fed up with each other, then you’re setting yourself up for a huge fall!
What should be done, and many couples fail to do, is to sit down before marriage and have a frank and honest exchange about how they both see the marriage working. This should be one of the biggest discussions that should be had before there is even an actual marriage, but all too often such a conversation doesn’t even figure.
A great way to approach such a talk is to spend as much time mapping out a Marriage Contract as you both need to. Many marriages, whether new or established, are based on such contracts and these are the marriages that stand the test of time.
The Marriage Contract is a set of goals and agreements that the couple make together to keep the marriage on track and headed in the direction they both want.
The kind of agreements and goals that are typically set out are obviously going to be personal to each couple – what works for one couple, might not work for another. However, consider agreeing to such things in your personal Marriage Contract as: Who’ll do the cooking? How the budget for the household will be handled? The sharing of household chores and duties? How to handle differences of opinions?
Don’t make the mistake of dismissing these details. Keeping a marriage happy often rests on such details as money, time management and the ability to reconcile.
Keeping a marriage happy means not taking your spouse for granted. Consider regularly doing something unexpected for your spouse. If you are making them a packed lunch, then put a little cake or a little treat inside and then put a little love note in with the treat.
Make time to talk and share with each. This will stop distance from emerging within your marriage, because once distance grows between you and your spouse it can be a task and a half to make it disappear. Whatever you feel is a problem, talk to your spouse about the problem before it becomes the main focus of your marriage.
Keeping a marriage happy can be difficult, if you let it become difficult. If you think about doing something lovely for your spouse a couple times a week, then it takes the work out of keeping your marriage healthy and working as it should. Often all it takes is a little consideration and appreciation of your spouse and their feelings and you will find that that is all reciprocated right back at you.
I wonder what would happen in your relationship if your focus was on making it work?